The Dublinersの最近のブログ記事

TITLE: Don't Get Married　（ドント・ゲット・マリード）
AUTHOR: Leon Rosselson　（レオン・ロッセルソン）
PERFORMER: The Dubliners　（ザ・ダブリナーズ）

こんな曲を聴いたら、結婚なんかしたくなくなるだろう、と思わせるような曲です。でも、結婚生活を重ねた夫婦だったら、分からなくもないな、と思わせるような曲です。

何の因果か結婚したのに、気づいてみたら愚痴だらけ。まあ、愚痴も愛情表現のひとつですから、無理もありません。

給料が安いだの、勤務時間が長いだの、部長が性格悪いだの、愚痴をこぼしている間は愛社精神満タンの社員と何らの変わりません。

こんな愛情たっぷりの曲をダブリナーズのショーン・キャノン(Sean Cannon)が淡々と歌っています。

Don't get married girls you'll sign away your life
You may start off as a woman but you'll end up as the wife
You could be a vestal virgin take the veil and be a nun
But don't get married girls for marriage isn't fun

Oh, it's fine when you're romancing and he plays the lover's part
You're the roses in his garden you're the flame that warms his heart
And his love will last forever and he'll promise you the moon
But just wait until you're wedded then he'll sing a different tune

You're his tapioca pudding you're the dumplings in his stew
But he'll soon begin to wonder what he ever saw in you
Still he takes without complaining all the dishes you provide
For you see he's got to have his bit of jam tart on the side

So don't get married girls it's very badly paid
You may start off as the mistress but you'll end up as the maid
Be a daring deep sea diver be a polished polyglot
But don't get married girls for marriage is a plot

Have you seen him in the morning with a face that looks like death
With dandruff on his pillow and tobacco on his breath
And he needs some reassurance with his cup of tea in bed
For he's worried by the mortgage and the bald patch on his head

And he's sure that you're his mother lays his head upon your breast
So you try to boost his ego iron his shirt and warm his vest
Then you get him off to work the mighty hunter is restored
And he leaves you there with nothing but the dreams you can't afford

So don't get married girls men they're all the same
They just use you when they need you you'd do better on the game
Be a call girl, be a stripper, be a hostess, be a whore
But don't get married girls for marriage is a bore

When he comes home in the evening he can hardly spare a look
All he says is what's for dinner, after all you're just the cook
But when he takes you to a party well, he eyes you with a frown
For you know you've got to look your best you mustn't let him down

And he'll clutch you with that look-what-I've-got twinkle in his eyes
Like he's entered for a raffle and he's won you for the prize
Ah, but when the party's over you'll be slogging through the sludge
Half the time a decoration and the other half a drudge

So don't get married it'll drive you round the bend
It's the lane without a turning it's the end without an end
Take a lover every Friday, take up tennis, be a nurse
But don't get married girls for marriage is a curse

Then you get him off to work the mighty hunter is restored
And he leaves you there with nothing but the dreams you can't afford

TITLE: The Fields Of Athenry　（ザ・フィールズ・オブ・アセンライ）
AUTHOR: Pete St. John　（ピート・セント・ジョン）
PERFORMER: The Dubliners　（ザ・ダブリナーズ）

中村俊輔のいたセルティック(Celtic Football Club)のサポーター・ソングにもなっているこの曲は割と新しく、1970年代に作られたものです。

1840,50年代に発生したアイルランドのジャガイモ大飢饉のときに、必要に迫られてとうもろこしを盗んだマイケルがオーストラリアに流刑になってしまう、というのがその内容です。

動画はザ・ダブリナーズ40周年コンサートで、パディー・ライリー(Paddy Reilly)がボーカルを務めています。コーラスの箇所で、観客から合いの手が入ります。

Where once we watched the small free birds fly
　"Hey baby let the free birds fly"
　（ヘイ・ベイビー・レット・ザ・フリー・バーズ・フライ）
Our love was on the wing
　"Sinn Féin"
　（シン・フェイン）
We had dreams and songs to sing
　"IRA"
　（アイアールエイ）

Trevelyn　（トレベリヤン）：　サー・チャールズ・エドワード・トレベリヤン(Sir Charles Edward Trevelyn)、19世紀大飢饉時の大英帝国の役人
Athenry　（アセンライ）：　アイルランド、ゴールウェイ州(Co. Galway)にある土地の名
Botany Bay　（ボタニー・ベイ）：　オーストラリアのサウスウェールズ州にある湾

By a lonely prison wall
I heard a young girl calling
Michael they are taking you away
For you stole Trevelyn's corn
So the young might see the morn
Now a prison ship lies waiting in the bay

Low lie the Fields of Athenry
Where once we watched the small free birds fly
Our love was on the wing
We had dreams and songs to sing
It's so lonely 'round the Fields of Athenry

By a lonely prison wall
I heard a young man calling
Nothing matters Mary when you're free
Against the Famine and the Crown
I rebelled they ran me down
Now you must raise our child with dignity

Low lie the Fields of Athenry
Where once we watched the small free birds fly
Our love was on the wing
We had dreams and songs to sing
It's so lonely 'round the Fields of Athenry

By a lonely harbour wall
She watched the last star falling
As that prison ship sailed out against the sky
Sure she'll wait and hope and pray
For her love in Botany Bay
It's so lonely 'round the Fields of Athenry

Low lie the Fields of Athenry
Where once we watched the small free birds fly
Our love was on the wing
We had dreams and songs to sing
It's so lonely 'round the Fields of Athenry

TITLE: Molly Malone　（モリー・マローン）
AUTHOR:
PERFORMER: The Dubliners　（ザ・ダブリナーズ）

朝、常磐線の上り電車が上野に到着すると、かつぎ屋の行商人のおばちゃんたちが大きな箱を背負い、力強く電車から降りてゆく姿を目にしたものです。確か、1980年代前半までは見られたのではないかと記憶しています。

千葉県から野菜などを都内で売るために来ていたようです。

モリー・マローンはアイルランドで貝を売り歩く女性です。実在したかどうかはさておき、銅像があるそうです。

動画は、最近のザ・ダブリナーズのライブバージョンで、ルーク・ケリーもロニー・ドリューもキアラン・バークもボビー・リンチもいませんが、パッツィー・ワッチホーンのボーカルで老若男女の客と一体になって、楽しそうに歌っています。実にほほえましい光景です。

In Dublin's fair city
Where the girls are so pretty
I first set my eyes on sweet Molly Malone
And she wheeled her wheel barrow
Through the streets broad and narrow
Crying cockles and mussels alive alive oh

Alive alive-O
Alive alive-O
Crying cockles and mussels
Alive alive-O

She was a fish monger
And sure it was no wonder
So were her mother and father before
And they wheeled their wheel barrow
Through the streets broad and narrow
Crying cockles and mussels alive alive oh

Alive alive-O
Alive alive-O
Crying cockles and mussels
Alive alive-O

She died of a fever
And no one could save her
And that was the end of sweet Molly Malone
Now her ghost wheels her barrow
Through the streets broad and narrow
Crying cockles and mussels alive alive oh

Alive alive-O
Alive alive-O
Crying cockles and mussels
Alive alive-O

TITLE: Hot Asphalt　（ホット・アスファルト）
AUTHOR:
PERFORMER: The Dubliners　（ザ・ダブリナーズ）

この曲を知るまでアスファルトに色々な種類があるなど全く知りませんでした。アスファルトと言えば、道路の舗装に使われるものしか見たことがありませんので、勉強になりました。

道路工事に携わったアイルランド人が仲間と、口の悪い警官をアスファルトものとも溶かしてしまおう、という内容なのですが、これは史実に基づいた．．．、というものではありません。

仕事が大変なら、それだけはけ口も必要でしょう。歌の世界は面白いものです。

Killarney　（キラーニー）：　アイルランド南西部ケリー州の町
geansaí　（ギャンズィー）：　アイルランド語で「セーター、ジャージ」の意
Tipperary　（ティペラリー）：　アイルランドの州
Kelvingrove Museum　（ケルビングローブ・ミュージアム）：　スコットランドはグラスゴーにある美術館

Good evening all me jolly lads I'm glad to find you're well
If you'll gather all around me now the story I will tell
For I've got a situation and begorrah and begob
I can whisper I've the weekly wage of nineteen bob

'Tis twelve months come October since I left me native home
After helping in Killarney boys to bring the harvest down
But now I wear a geansaí and around me waist a belt
I'm the gaffer of the squad that makes the hot asphalt

We laid it in the hollows and we laid it in the flat
And if it doesn't last forever sure I swear I'll eat me hat
Well, I've wandered up and down the world but sure I never felt
Any surface that was equal to the hot asphalt

The other night a copper comes and he says to me, McGuire
Would you kindly let me light me pipe down at your boiler fire
And he planks himself right down in front with hobnails up too late
And says I, me decent man you'd better go and find your bate

He ups and yells, I'm down on you I'm up to all your pranks
Don't I know you for a traitor from the Tipperary ranks
Boys, I hit straight from the shoulder and I gave him such a belt
That I knocked him into the boiler full of hot asphalt

We laid it in the hollows and we laid it in the flat
And if it doesn't last forever sure I swear I'll eat me hat
Well, I've wandered up and down the world but sure I never felt
Any surface that was equal to the hot asphalt

We quickly pulled him out again and we threw him in the tub
And with soap and warm water we began to rub and scrub
But devil the thing, it hardened and it turned him hard as stone
And with every other rub sure you could hear the copper groan

I'm thinkin', says O'Reilly, that he's lookin' like Ould Nick
And burn me if I'm not inclined to claim him with me pick
Now, says I, it would be easier to boil him till he melts
And to stir him nice and easy in the hot asphalt

We laid it in the hollows and we laid it in the flat
And if it doesn't last forever sure I swear I'll eat me hat
Well, I've wandered up and down the world but sure I never felt
Any surface that was equal to the hot asphalt

You may talk about yer sailorlads ballad singers and the rest
Your shoemakers and your tailors but we please the ladies best
The only ones who know the way their flinty hearts to melt
Are the lads around the boiler making hot asphalt

With rubbing and with scrubbing sure I caught me death of cold
And for scientific purposes me body it was sold
In the Kelvingrove Museum, me boys I'm hangin' in me pelt
As a monument to the Irish making hot asphalt

We laid it in the hollows and we laid it in the flat
And if it doesn't last forever sure I swear I'll eat me hat
Well, I've wandered up and down the world but sure I never felt
Any surface that was equal to the hot asphalt

TITLE: A Gentleman Soldier　（ア・ジェントルマン・ソルジャー）
AUTHOR:
PERFORMER: The Dubliners　（ザ・ダブリナーズ）

兵隊さんが女の子に「悪さ」をする歌です。女の子は、一時は求婚をするも、妻のある身の兵隊さんに断られてしまいます。

男の子が生まれますが、当然お父さんはそばにはいません。

これもひとつの人の姿と思うしかありません。

Well, it's of a gentleman soldier as a sentry he did stand
He saluted a fair maid by a waving of his hand
So boldly then he kissed her and he passed it off as a joke
He drilled her up in the sentry box wapped up in a soldier's cloak

And the drums they go with a rata-ta-tat
And the fifes they loudly play
Fare thee well Polly me dear
I must be going away

All night they tossed and tumbled 'til daylight did appear
The soldier rose, put on his clothes, saying fare you well me dear
For the drums they are a sounding and the fifes does sweetly play
If it weren't for that dear Polly then along with you I'd stay

And the drums they go with a rata-ta-tat
And the fifes they loudly play
Fare thee well Polly me dear
I must be going away

Oh, come you gentleman soldier, won't you marry me
Oh no, me dearest Polly such things never can be
For I've a wife already and children I have three
Two wives are allowed in the army but one's too many for me

And the drums they go with a rata-ta-tat
And the fifes they loudly play
Fare thee well Polly me dear
I must be going away

If anyone comes a courting you you can treat them to a glass
If anyone comes a courting you you can say you're a country lass
You don't have to tell them that ever you played this joke
That you were drilled in a sentry box wrapped up in a soldier's cloak

And the drums they go with a rata-ta-tat
And the fifes they loudly play
Fare thee well Polly me dear
I must be going away

Oh, come you gentleman soldier, why didn't you tell me so
My parents will be angry when this they come to know
And when nine long months had come and passed the poor girl she brought shame
She had a little militia boy and she didn't know his name

And the drums they go with a rata-ta-tat
And the fifes they loudly play
fare thee well Polly me dear
I must be going away

TITLE: The Rocky Road To Dublin　（ザ・ロッキー・ロード・トゥー・ダブリン）
AUTHOR:
PERFORMER: The Dubliners　（ザ・ダブリナーズ）

「針が擦り切れるまで聞く」とは20世紀後半によく聞いた表現ですが、針がなくても擦り切れるほど聞ける21世紀にも使えるのならば、ぜひ使いたい表現です。この曲はおそらくこれまでに誇張して言えば500回以上は聴いたと思います。

最初に聞いたときはびっくりしました。早口言葉の歌かと思ったぐらいでした。更にびっくりしたのは何事もなかったかのようにルーク・ケリーが歌っているところです。どこから空気を肺に入れているのでしょうか。

この曲はスリップ・ジグ(slip jig)と呼ばれる形式らしいのですが、字面をとれば、「滑るように進んでいくテンポの速い曲」といったところでしょうか。中学校時代に音楽が「１」だった私に分かるのはこの程度です。

これに歌詞をのせて歌うのですから、至難の業です。それをいとも簡単にこなすルーク・ケリーは．．．　レジェンド（伝説）と呼ばれているのも納得できます。

地名が出てきます。若干の個人的見解を含めた注釈を加えておきます。
Tuam（トゥーム）：　アイルランド西部の都市名
Mullingar（マリンガー）：　アイルランド中央部の都市名
Paddy（パディー）：　アイルランド人（男性）の愛称
Connacht（コナート）：　アイルランド中央部から西部にかけての地方名
Holyhead（ホーリーヘッド）：　ウェールズ北部の港町
Liverpool（リバプール）：　イングランド西海岸の都市名
Erin（エリン）：　アイルランド語で「アイルランドの」を意味するÉireannからと思われる
shillelagh（シレーリー）：　木製の杖（歌詞にもでてくるように、ブラックソーンの太い枝から作られるもの。単なる杖ではなく、大袈裟かもしれないが、騎士の剣に匹敵するものではないかと勝手に思っている）

In the merry month of June, from me home I started
Left the girls of Tuam, so sad and broken hearted
Saluted father dear, kissed me darling mother
Drank a pint of beer, me grief and tears to smother
Then off to reap the corn, leave where I was born
Cut a stout blackthorn to banish ghosts and goblins
In a brand-new pair of brogues, rattlin' o'er the bogs
And frightenin' all the dogs on the rocky road to Dublin

One, two, three, four, five
Hunt the hare and turn her down the rocky road
And all the way to Dublin, whack fol la de rah

In Mullingar that night I rested limbs so weary
Started by daylight next morning bright and early
Took a drop of the pure to keep me heart from sinking
That's the Paddy's cure whenever he's on for drinking
To see the lassies smile, laughing all the while
At me curious style, 'twould set your heart a-bubblin'
Asked me was I hired, wages I required
'Til I was almost tired of the rocky road to Dublin

One, two, three, four, five
Hunt the hare and turn her down the rocky road
And all the way to Dublin, whack fol la de rah

In Dublin next arrived, I thought it such a pity
To be so soon deprived a view of that fine city
So then I took a stroll, all among the quality
Me bundle it was stole, all in a neat locality
Something crossed me mind, when I looked behind
No bundle could I find upon me stick a-wobblin'
Enquiring for the rogue, they said me Connacht brogue
Wasn't much in vogue on the rocky road to Dublin

One, two, three, four, five
Hunt the hare and turn her down the rocky road
And all the way to Dublin, whack fol la de rah

From there I got away, me spirits never failing
Landed on the quay, just as the ship was sailing
Captain at me roared, said that no room had he
When I jumped aboard, a cabin found for Paddy
Down among the pigs, played some hearty rigs
Danced some hearty jigs, the water round me bubbling
When off Holyhead I wished meself was dead
Or better far instead on the rocky road to Dublin

One, two, three, four, five
Hunt the hare and turn her down the rocky road
And all the way to Dublin, whack fol la de rah

The boys of Liverpool, when we safely landed
Called meself a fool, I could no longer stand it
Blood began to boil, temper I was losing
Poor old Erin's Isle, they began abusing
Hurrah me soul, says I, me shillelagh I let fly
Galway boys were by and saw I was a-hobblin'
With a loud hurray, they joined in the affray
Quickly cleared the way for the rocky road to Dublin

One, two, three, four, five
Hunt the hare and turn her down the rocky road
And all the way to Dublin, whack fol la de rah

TITLE: The Button Pusher　（ザ・ボタン・プッシャー）
AUTHOR: Enoch Kent　（エノック・ケント）
PERFORMER: The Dubliners　（ザ・ダブリナーズ）

作者のエノック・ケント(Enoch Kent)はスコットランド生まれで、現在はカナダ在住のミュージシャンです。そして、歌うはルーク・ケリー。

ヒトラーからブレジネフやニクソン、そして、カストロまで出てくるということは、おそらく大戦から70年代初頭を時代背景にしたものと思いますが、この曲がいつ作られたのか詳しいことは分かりません。

やはり、戦争をなくすにはボタン一つでドッカーン、とやって、人類を消滅させるしかないのでしょうか。

I am the man, the well-fed man in charge of the terrible knob
The most pleasing thing about it, it's almost a permanent job
When the atom war is over and the world is split in three
A consolation I've got, well maybe it's not there'll be nobody left but me

I sit at my desk in Washington in charge of this great machine
More vicious than Adolf Hitler more deadly than strychnine
And in the evening after a tiring day just to give myself a laugh
I hit the button a playful belt and I listen for the blast

I am the man, the well-fed man in charge of the terrible knob
The most pleasing thing about it, it's almost a permanent job
When the atom war is over and the world is split in three
A consolation I've got, well maybe it's not there'll be nobody left but me

If Brezhnev starts his nonsense and makes a nasty smell
With a wink and a nod from Nixon I'll blast them all to hell
And as for that fellow Castro him with the sugar cane
He needn't hide behind his whiskers I'll get him just the same

I am the man, the well-fed man in charge of the terrible knob
The most pleasing thing about it, it's almost a permanent job
When the atom war is over and the world is split in three
A consolation I've got, well maybe it's not there'll be nobody left but me

If me wife denies my conjucular rights or me breakfast milk is sour
From eight to nine in the morning you're in for a nervous hour
The button being so terribly close it's really a dreadful joke
A bump of my ass as I go past and we'll all go up in smoke

I am the man, the well-fed man in charge of the terrible knob
The most pleasing thing about it, it's almost a permanent job
When the atom war is over and the world is split in three
A consolation I've got, well maybe it's not there'll be nobody left but me

Now I'm thinking of joining the army the army that bans the bomb
We'll take up a large collection and I'll donate my thumb
For without it I am helpless and that's the way to be
You don't have to kill the whole bloody lot to make the people free

TITLE: The Dundee Weaver　（ザ・ダンディー・ウィーバー）
AUTHOR:
PERFORMER: The Dubliners　（ザ・ダブリナーズ）

都会に出た少女が、まちの男にひっかかり大切なものを奪われてしまう、そんなお話です。

男なんて目当てはみんな同じなんだから気をつけなさい、と忠告で終わっています。

それにしても、「男」のたとえが鳥とは、なんともはや。チュンチュン、なんて可愛い鳴き声など聞こえそうもありません。

大文字で始まる固有名詞に注釈をつけておきます。
Dundee （ダンディー）：　スコットランドの町、グラスゴーの北東に位置する
Glesca （グレスカ）：　スコットランドの都市グラスゴー(Glasgow)
Kelvin Haa （ケルビン・ハー）：　グラスゴーにあるケルビン・ホール(Kelvin Hall)
the Rouken Glen（ルッキン・グレン）：グラスゴーにある公園(Rouken Glen Park)

Oh, I am a Dundee weaver
And I come frae bonnie Dundee
I met a Glesca fellae
An' he came courtin me
He took me oot a walkin
Doon by the Kelvin Haa
And there the dirty wee rascal stole
Ma thingamajig awa
There the dirty wee rascal stole
Ma thingamajig awa

He took me oot a walkin
Doon by the Rouken Glen
He showed to me the bonnie wee birds
And he showed me a bonnie wee hen
He showed to me the bonnie wee birds
Frae a linnet tae a craw
And he showed to me the bird that stole
Ma thingamajig awa
He showed to me the bird that stole
Ma thingamajig awa

Noo I'll gang back to Dundee
Lookin bonny, young and fair
I'll put on ma buckle an' shoes
An' tie up ma bonnie broun hair
I'll put on ma corsets tight
Tae mak ma body look smaa
And wha will ken ma rosy cheeks
Ma thingamajig's awa
And wha will ken ma rosy cheeks
Ma thingamajig's awa

Oh, all ye Dundee weavers
Tak this advice frae me
Never let a fellae an inch above yer knee
Never stand at the back o' a close
Or up again' the waa
For if ye dae, ye can safely say
Yer thingamajig's awa
For if ye dae, ye can safely say
Yer thingamajig's awa

TITLE: The Black Velvet Band　（ザ・ブラック・べルベット・バンド）
AUTHOR:
PERFORMER: The Dubliners　（ザ・ダブリナーズ）

オーストラリアの南東に位置するタスマニア島はその昔、オランダ東インド会社の総督の名にちなんで「ヴァン・ディーメンス・ランド(Van Diemens Land)」と呼ばれていました。

島は、いつの世も流刑地になる運命を背負っていますが、こことて例外ではありません。19世紀には、島流しの刑にあった「犯罪者」がここに送られることになります。

ベルファストで美人が犯した罪の濡れ衣を着せられた男の話が、今回の「ブラック・ベルベット・バンド」のテーマです。常識で考えると、こんなことがあるのか、と思ってしまいます。しかも、懲役７年とは。

この歌からわかるのは、どんな罪を犯しても、あるいは、冤罪であっても、必ずタスマニアに島流しになっていた、というよりは、19世紀当時はタスマニアが流刑地のひとつになっていた、ということでしょう。もしくは、男は女に弱い、ということでしょうか。

ルーク・ケリーが力いっぱい、楽しそうに歌っています。見ているだけで、力をもらえそうです。

In a neat little town they call Belfast
Apprenticed to trade I was bound
Many an hour's sweet happiness
Have I spent in that neat little town
A sad misfortune came over me
Which caused me to stray from the land
Far away from my friends and relations
Betrayed by the black velvet band

Her eyes they shone like diamonds
I thought her the queen of the land
And her hair it hung over her shoulder
Tied up with a black velvet band

I took a stroll down Broadway
Meaning not long for to stay
When who should I meet but this pretty fair maid
Comes a traipsing along the highway
She was both fair and handsome
Her neck it was just like a swan
And her hair it hung over her shoulder
Tied up with a black velvet band

Her eyes they shone like diamonds
I thought her the queen of the land
And her hair it hung over her shoulder
Tied up with a black velvet band

I took a stroll with this pretty fair maid
And a gentleman passing us by
Well I knew she meant the doing of him
By the look in her roguish black eye
A gold watch she took from his pocket
And placed it right in to my hand
And the very first thing that I said was
Bad 'cess to the black velvet band

Her eyes they shone like diamonds
I thought her the queen of the land
And her hair it hung over her shoulder
Tied up with a black velvet band

Before the judge and the jury
Next morning I had to appear
The judge he says to me, young man
Your case it is proven clear
We'll give you seven years' penal servitude
To be spent faraway from the land
Far away from your friends and relations
Betrayed by the black velvet band

Her eyes they shone like diamonds
I thought her the queen of the land
And her hair it hung over her shoulder
Tied up with a black velvet band

So come all you jolly young fellows
A warning take by me
When you are out on the town, me lads
Beware of them pretty colleens
For they'll feed you with strong drink, me lads
'Til you are unable to stand
And the very next thing that you know is
You've landed in Van Diemens Land

Her eyes they shone like diamonds
I thought her the queen of the land
And her hair it hung over her shoulder
Tied up with a black velvet band

TITLE: The Sick Note　（ザ・シック・ノート）
AUTHOR: Pat Cooksey　（パット・クックシー）
PERFORMER: The Dubliners　（ザ・ダブリナーズ）

アイルランド人は飢饉や貧困のため島を離れ、新天地で体を使った仕事に従事していた、なんて書いてあるものを読みますが、この歌は建設現場で働く男の身に起こった出来事をコミカルに描いています。

こんなことが現実に起こるかどうかを考えるのは野暮というもの。同情、憐憫の類も不要。笑い飛ばすのが一番。

「ザ・ガーデン・ウェア・ザ・プレイティーズ・グロー(The Garden Where The Praties Grow)」という曲に歌詞をのせたもので、タイトルの「シック・ノート(The Sick Note)」以外に、いろいろな題名をつけて、いろいろなアーチストが歌っています。

Dear Sir I write this note to you to tell you of my plight
For at the time of writing I am not a pretty sight
My body is all black and blue my face a deathly grey
And I write this note to say why Paddy's not at work today

Whilst working on the fourteenth floor some bricks I had to clear
To throw them down from such a height was not a good idea
The foreman wasn't very pleased the bloody awkward sod
He said I had to cart them down the ladders in my hod

Now clearing all these bricks by hand it was so very slow
So I hoisted up a barrel and secured the rope below
But in my haste to do the job I was too blind to see
That a barrel full of building bricks was heavier than me

And so when I untied the rope the barrel fell like lead
And clinging tightly to the rope I started up instead
I shot up like a rocket till to my dismay I found
That half way up I met the bloody barrel coming down

Well the barrel broke my shoulder as to the ground it sped
And when I reached the top I banged the pulley with my head
I clung on tightly, numb with shock from this almighty blow
And the barrel spilled out half the bricks fourteen floors below

Now when these bricks had fallen from the barrel to the floor
I then outweighed the barrel and so started down once more
Still clinging tightly to the rope my body racked with pain
When half way down I met the bloody barrel once again

The force of this collision half way up the office block
Caused multiple abrasions and a nasty state of shock
Still clinging tightly to the rope I fell towards the ground
And I landed on the broken bricks the barrel scattered round

I lay there groaning on the ground I thought I'd passed the worst
But the barrel hit the pulley wheel and then the bottom burst
A shower of bricks rained down on me I hadn't got a hope
As I lay there bleeding on the ground I let go the bloody rope

The barrel then being heavier then started down once more
And landed right across me as I lay upon the floor
It broke three ribs, and my left arm and I can only say
That I hope you'll understand why Paddy's not at work today